Principles & Skills of Loving

These principles and skills of loving have inspired my work and my life. First described to me by the Reverend Jerry Jud in 1993, these principles state love is an intention, not just a feeling. Most importantly, intention also requires the consistent practice of the skills of loving.

More than anything else, we want to love and be loved.
Love is a gift.
Love is not time bound.
Love is good will in action.
Love is a response to need.

Seeing: I do not look over or through you, I see you in your uniqueness.

Hearing: I listen to what you are saying.

Honoring of feelings and ideas: I recognize your right to think and feel as you do.

Having good will: I will you good and not evil. I care about you.

Responding to Need: If you let me know what your needs are, within the limits of my value system, I will not run away. I will be there for you.

To support these principles and skills of loving, a spiritual practice is key, and gratitude is one of life’s highest spiritual practices. I believe the world could benefit from more of us applying the Principles & Skills of Loving to everyday interactions.